Smooth property deals: How agents can manage couples buying together

With nine out of 10 joint properties owned by romantic partners, property professionals are bound to deal with couples throughout the course of their careers.

When dealing with couples, Paliwal advises agents to recognise each partner’s property goals and keep both parties engaged to ensure a seamless process.

As a result, they can boost efficiency, earn the trust of their clients, and potentially generate long-term leads.

Paliwal said the biggest mistake he sees agents make is assuming couples are on the same page, when in fact, one may be more in control of the process than the other.

“Usually one drives while the other drifts. The fix? Give each partner space to share their own goals before bringing them together,” he said.

In addition, Paliwal advised agents to pay attention to couples’ body language and verbal cues to identify signs of uncertainty before seeking clarification.

“You can spot tension early in the little things – hesitation, conflicting language, or one partner saying, ‘We haven’t decided,’” he said.

The signs can also include multiple ideas thrown around by each partner, followed by remarks such as, “We will have a chat and come back to you.”

“That’s your cue to dig deeper and get the real priorities on the table,” Paliwal said.

Furthermore, Paliwal said that agents should ensure both partners are equally involved in the property process, never allowing one partner to become a passive participant.

“Address them equally, send updates to both, and tailor your pitch to each perspective: numbers for one, lifestyle for the other. Everyone stays invested in the outcome,” he said.

He added that, rather than disagreements being viewed as a problem, agents can see them as fuel to reach an agreement that both partners are satisfied with.

“One wants growth, the other wants safety? Perfect. Blend both in a conversation and presentation to help them get a portfolio that’s ambitious and bulletproof,” he said.

Paliwal said he always recommends that couples avoid getting caught up in emotions, assign specific roles, put aside pride, and set rules, as these will be key to investing or buying together.

Additionally, he said that assigning roles ensures efficiency, meaning the couple is not held back from progressing in their property portfolio due to decision paralysis.

“The mistake I see is a couple that goes, ‘Well, let’s jointly make a decision on what we buy. Let’s jointly make a decision on when we get ready to go,’” Paliwal said.

“Then someone compromises and someone carries a feeling, that’s about to pop out as soon as something goes wrong.

“Then decision paralysis. There’s all this stop, start, stop, start, left decision or right decision.”

Paliwal, who’s a seasoned investor, said he and his wife maintain a strong relationship during the buying process by taking on clear, distinct roles, noting that defined responsibilities make partnerships work more smoothly.

“For our example, I know that when it comes to finance, actioning anything to do with finance, insurance, property management, bills, maintenance, anything like that, my wife owns that space.

“From my side, it’s just three points: the direction of what we’re buying, when we want to buy, and the specific property and market we buy.”

Paliwal said that neither he nor his wife questions each other when they carry out their assigned tasks, and therefore, a sense of trust is formed between them.

“I think this mutual trust and diversion of roles or division of roles is really key,” he said.

According to Paliwal, agents advising couples need to ensure both partners are on the same page to achieve the best outcomes for their finances and their relationship.

“I would say that the successful property scaling that we’ve seen with over 2,000 purchases made, hands down, the couples on the same page always take it the furthest,” Paliwal said.

On the other hand, if a couple fails to align their goals, it can spell trouble for the relationship, with financial reasons being one of the largest factors contributing to divorce.

Another piece of advice Paliwal gave to couples is to set aside their pride and ego, resisting the urge to say, “I told you so” when something goes wrong in the property journey.

“That’s the biggest part, because then it doubts decision-making moving forward, it doubts trust moving forward.”

In a healthy relationship, he said, individuals are also reflective about their decisions and seek to understand what they could have done better.

“If my wife made a mistake on something with the insurance policies or something like that, I’m not going to go and [say], ‘What the hell are we doing here? Why did we do it this way? I told you so.’

“So you’ve got to eliminate that and let people be reflective and pick up their own things and go from there. Because you’ve given them that role, you’ve given them that trust. Let them learn it as well.”

Paliwal also encouraged couples to make rules for themselves, including financial restrictions, so they can avoid putting themselves and their families in trouble.

“For example, to avoid putting my family into jeopardy, I’m going to go, ‘Well, I have $25,000 per property in my portfolio as a buffer right before I go and take money out of a company.’

“I’m going to make sure I [don’t] go below three to six months of my bills in my company as a buffer.”

He said that if rules are in place, it’s easier for partners to trust one another and to have the assurance they can make more decisions in the future.

“It’s like, well, ‘Why not let him go and make the decision on that’, or ‘Let her go and make the decision on this,’ because they’ve got rules in place to protect us as a family,” Paliwal concluded.

Listen to the full conversation here.